Life Witty Quotes Short Funny Quotes

Real girls are never perfect and perfect girls are never real.

Life witty quotes short funny quotes. Beware of the naked man who offers you his shirt. Choose a job you love and you will never have to work a day in your life. I walk around like everything is fine but deep down inside my shoe my sock is. Don t worry about the world coming to an end today.

12th of 60 funny motivational quotes work until your bank account looks like a phone number unknown. If the grass is greener on the other side you can bet the water bill is higher. Home funny quotes need a quick laugh. I m not rude i just have the balls to say what everyone else is thinking 3.

Awesome short funny quotes about life to make you laugh i don t broadcast every high. If you re looking for some very interesting short funny quotes on love and relationships. Wise and witty quotes. Experience is like a comb that life gives you when you are bald.

Also check out our list of john mulaney quotes that will remind you laughter is the best medicine. The most dangerous phrase in any language is we ve always done it this way 4. My dream job would be the karma delivery service. So if you re going to steal your neighbor s newspaper that s the time to do it.

9 short funny quotes about life by george burns. Arguing with a fool proves there are two doris m. Here are 60 short and funny motivational quotes to help brighten your day. No one looks back on their life and remembers the nights they got plenty of sleep.

Funny short saying any girl can be glamorous. Funny quotes and sayings 1. If you ran like your mouth you d be in good shape. A clear conscience is a sure sign of a bad memory mark twain.

Wise man talk because they have something to say fools talk because they have to say something. In the words of aristotle wit is educated insolence. The mind replays what the heart can t delete 2. Always remember that you are unique just like everybody else unknown.

It s always darkest before the dawn. Then the following short funny quotes by george burns are the most suitable ones. Let us put away the why so serious face and have some fun with these funny witty bitchy sarcastic quotes. Funny sarcastic witty quotes funny life quotes.

He said onions are the only food that makes you cry. See if these witty quotes strike your funny bone. Our collection of short funny quotes which are short straight to your head and mind blowing. So i threw a coconut on his face.

Witty quotes and images. My friend thinks he s smart.